Updated: Mar 5
'Anxiety starts when you try to control what's uncontrollable or when you are continually failing to control what's under our control or controllable."
Anxiety or worries and all of your sorrows starts when you reject the objective reality, instead you choose to blame others including you. You don't take control of what's in your hand, you stay busy hosting your pity party, you invite all people to your pity party, thereby you are also spreading sadness, making them unhappy as well.
This doesn't mean you shouldn't seek help or share your issues with others or feel sad. Once your 1st pity party is over, once you get the necessary tips or suggestions from your counselor or therapist, you need to try accepting yourself and move on.
Take control of controllables! live with the rest!! You have no other choice! Sooner you accept this happier you get!
It's not easy, it takes time, but you need to keep on banging, then you'll become alright. We see people taking some suggestions to accept the reality, they fail to implement it. Some are so obsessed with sharing the same problems, they spend hell lot of time, just complaining or saying that how life's been unfair to them. We understand all these sadness or depressions are thought programs, which are running continuously. You have programmed yourself consciously or unconsciously. There's no solution than to break the chain loop. You host pity parties, because there's satisfaction derived from feeling sad or depressed or we call it - 'MELENCHOLIC ECSTASY'. Initially, most share the same issues. Later on, they accept and start the process of LIFE TRANSFORMATION.
Life basically has 2 factors: Controllable & Uncontrollable. Our past and future are uncontrollable. Past is absolutely uncontrollable, but future gets influenced by what we do 'Now'. You need to radically accept the fact that whatever has happened fair or unfair, just or unjust is done & it's over. No use of continually screwing yourself up. It won't change anything. This is THE POWER OF RADICAL ACCEPTANCE.
In support of this, Sir Thomas Carlyle said.
"Our business here is to do what lies clearly at hand, not that's dimly visible at a distance."
To take control of your life, first you need to stop blackmailing our present, you need to forgive ourselves and others, most importantly your past. But don't forget the lessons! Take control of this moment! This shapes your future aka destiny!
You need to forgive past but remember the lessons. You need to improve upon your mistakes and flaws, this ensures success! This only can ensure health and wellness.
You need to trust in something you can call it the divinity, God, or Karma or whatever that you believe is present beyond your reach, guiding you through these struggles, and believe that it's all going to be OK in the end. You need to understand that all these struggles or pain or hardships are purifying you (your ego). It's transforming you, actualizing your potential & have made you who you are or making you, who you want to be some day.
There aren't any accidents in this universe, everything is happening as planned, in a secret order, that's good to all or what we call the 'common good'.
You can’t connect the dots looking forward; you can only connect them looking backwards. So, you have to trust that the dots will somehow connect in your future. You have to trust in something — your gut, destiny, life, karma, whatever. – Steve Jobs