Each one of us wants to get attention & respect at our place of work, at social gatherings & at home. No one wants to be a laugh-stock. Remember, we can never expect respect, we should command respect. Here are the techniques to command respect, become an adorable leader and a human -
1. Be the last to speak by Nelson Mandela: Nelson Mandela is universally considered as ‘The best leader.’ Nelson Mandela was the son of a tribal chief. When his father was attending tribal meetings, Nelson used to accompany him. In every meeting, his father was the last person to speak.
Speaking at last enables one to get an idea about the views of others thereby it helps one to improve their own idea. Also, it enables all others to have a feeling that they are given an opportunity to speak.
2. Induce hope & security by Simon Sinek: We see so many companies' shutdown units & lay off employees as a part of their cost-cutting policies. The question is How many of us really feel secure in our company? A great leader trusts his followers, they induce hope & security among team members. The best example of an ideal leader is a parent in a family setup. Our parents want us to excel, and live better lives than what they have in their lives. They provide us security, hope and also, they look after us till we become mature enough to manage ourselves.
The same characteristics are exhibited by great leaders. Charlie Kim, CEO of a tech co. called Nexjump in New York ensures lifetime employment in his company. Even if the employees want to quit, managers counsel them to solve their problems & thereby enable them to continue their employment. A true leader will sacrifice numbers for his people. Unfortunately, in the current business scenario it’s the opposite. We are ready to sacrifice people to get our numbers. We see endless examples of CEOs despite getting their huge payments, they mismanage & scam the people. Ultimately, the executive management will be sacked, the company becomes a TARGET for ACTIVIST INVESTORS. Very recently, it happened with Twitter.
Bob Chapman, who owns a manufacturing unit in the mid-west doesn’t consider the ‘headcounts’, instead he considers the ‘heart counts’ of his company. His company lost substantial business due to recession, the board proposed to lay off some of the employees. But Bob rejected instead he mandated all employees to take unpaid vacation of 4 weeks. Soon, employees gained back their trust they started trading their unpaid vacation among themselves. Like, let him go for 3 weeks & she for 5 weeks & so on.
The same culture is followed in Indian MNCs like Tata Sons. Many IT professionals consider TCS feel secure! They know their loyalty will always be regarded. We could see in India, employers attending an employee marriage or any functions. They consider employees like their brothers, that's the trust they have. It takes empathy to understand employee problems.
Employees perform better when they feel secure and rewarded in their jobs.
Remember, true leaders will never give up on their men. Leadership is a choice it’s not a rank. In fact, each one of us are & can become a leader in our areas. Make sure to provide all these if you want to be respected as a leader & as an individual.
3. Be accountable & dedicated: if you take an inside look at iPhone, you notice that it is exactly same as that of the outside look of an iPhone. When Steve Jobs was developing iPhone, one of his employees expressed concerns over this symmetry and he also explained that this feature is not used for the promotion. Steve turned down his concern by telling him that it should satisfy him, and it’s his craftsmanship. So, dedicated and accountable people no matter where they go, they give their dedicated efforts & be accountable for their work.
4. Respect everyone: The live example for this is Floyd Mayweather & Conor Mcgregor. After finishing UFC fight, if we listen to the compliments given to each other will make us wonder; despite they being hard-core opponents in a figh, they treated each other so cordially & they both had the humility to list out each other's positive attributes in the fight. In support of this Richard Branson quotes;
“Respect is how you treat everyone, not just those you want to impress.”
Pic credits: Quotes Mag
5. Let your actions speak than your words by Eric Thomas: Eric says that most of us will talk before we do it. We keep on talking about our next plan, and seldom we execute it. As per the psychology, if we talk before, we do it, it makes us to lose our motivation to take action for it. Sometimes when we are not satisfied with the work or effort or we're craving for someone's attention or recognition, we talk about the plans. There's nothing wrong with telling your plans to your loved ones, but it's just not going to help you! Progress resides in actions not in words or thinking or discussion about plans.
pic credits: Influencr
Recently I read a Quote; "Silent Moves but Loud Results.” If we talk about it we don’t do it what would be the impression on others & about ourselves in our views. If we over-promise & under-deliver, it’s for sure that we will lose our job in the company. It’s considered as a potential threat to us & to the company.
6. Be brutally honest: Being brutally honest doesn’t mean being rude & impolite. There are a lot of ways to convey the truths known to us in a polite manner. Being honest itself is a virtue. There’s an old saying in Sanskrit -
Satyam bruyat – priyam bruyat- na bruyat satyam apriyam |
priyam cha nanrutam bruyat – esha dharmah sanatanah ||
Rough translation -
Speak the Truth, speak pleasantly,
Do not speak the Truth in an unpleasant manner
Even if pleasant, do not speak untruth,
This is the path of eternal righteousness.
Anyways, truth always unveils itself naturally in the honest manner. Honest people are highly respected because of reliability & transparency. It takes a lot of discipline to be honest & it’s worth fighting for.
7. Laugh at yourself by Will Smith: When Will Smith’s father was diagnosed with an incurable cancer & doctors told his family to expect him to live for 3 weeks from then, his father took it lightly. When we take harsh things lightly it not only makes us to live happily but also it increases our life span. His father continued to even after living 3 weeks. When Will Smith was going to meet him in the hospital, he was telling him; Despite doctors announcing that this old man will live only for another three weeks is still living for more than a month.
Generally, people who take everything serious tend to develop complications and are more vulnerable to diseases. But those who have the power to laugh at everything (not everyone😉) especially on themselves & take life lightly will live longer, happier lives than anyone else.
8. Stop hosting a ‘Pity Party.’: As per the Stoic Philosophy; Events keep on happening in our lives, but what makes the difference is our beliefs & reactions to that event. Whenever an unfavorable event happens, stop hosting a pity party. People who have high levels of self-pity generate unhappiness in the minds of people around them. People generally tend to avoid such individuals with self-pity. It’s not wrong to feel sad for some time about the loss, but simply catastrophizing about the event doesn’t make any sense & it eats up the present-day energy. It will make us even worse than we were. There is a popular saying that 'Only 10% problems rest all our reactions towards events." Moreover, we cannot do anything about that event.
Self-Pity is considered as a narcissistic trait among humans. While courageous & self-confident individuals command respect from others.
9. Coach the needy by Denzel Washington: Denzel Washington says he derives priceless happiness by coaching the needy & see them progress in their career. As mentioned in the earlier posts, coaching somebody increases our proficiency & also we become more respectable & become more successful in our careers. In any organization, people respect domain experts for the wisdom they possess over the domain.
10. Be Authentic: The chief difference between honest & authentic is Honest is ‘to adorn or honor or to make becoming’ while authentic is authoritative in nature. Dale Carnegie in his book; How to win friends & influence people says, ‘Be genuinely interested in People.’ He emphasizes the word ‘genuinely,’ so many of us tend to wear masks just to impress our boss, girl or boyfriends. But interestingly, when we tend to change ourselves for the sake of others, people will notice us. And we end up losing the respect within & outside. In fact, authenticity inherently creates respect.
Dale Carnegie in his book ‘How to Stop Worrying & Start Living’ quotes as follows:
“Let’s not imitate others. Let’s find ourselves & be ourselves.” The same is propounded by Buddha in the following quote-
“Three things cannot be long hidden; sun, moon & the truth.” -Gautama Buddha.
pic credits: Fearless Soul
“Authenticity has become a modern luxury.”
Authentic people command respect in society. All great humans have been respected for their authentic purpose & personality.
14. Give credit when it's due: We see individuals who take every help as granted. It basically indicates self-centered attitude. We see managers who never bother about mentioning team member names who performed well in the previous quarters or in times of crisis. This will end up in losing respect towards the person. Instead, a small appreciation could have brought in so much of happiness to performers. It's human psychology to expect recognition & attention. The same manager would be expecting recognition from the senior management. But he doesn't dare to recognize others. When pay-per-performance compensation model was introduced in Microsoft, under-performing teams' performance showed drastic improvements. Earlier, with bell curve model there was raging discontent among team members, in turn it increased favoritism. Now, Microsoft is on its way to becoming a trillion dollar tech giant. Even Deloitte adopted this model. So, please give credit when it's due - please like, share and subscribe!